Why Love when It's Gonna End anyway?

People say life is short, and you shouldn't waste time doing things that are not worth it. We should do what we aspire to do, fulfill our dreams and live a good life before we address our coffin as our home. People also say, love like you have never loved before. But then, why do we fall in love with all these different people, and then it will come to an end eventually? If we can only love one person in our life, then it is worth loving and spending our time in it. But if not, why must we waste our time?

I kept hearing from friends around me having failing/failed relationships. "I've just broken up with my boyfriend last week." "My girlfriend dumped me for someone else." "We just don't think we suit each other anymore." "He just cannot forget my past and has become all cold to me." "We just don't love each other anymore." Then why be together in the first place? Why must we spend our time, energy, money and youth loving when the brake to the relationship is always there for us to step on?

Perhaps I am feeling jittery because my own relationship seems to be shaky and on the rocks. His apparent coldness, my antagonistic unreasonableness; his perceptions and reasonings for his behaviour, my never-fading insecurity causing my behaviour; our vast differences, our voracious stubbornness... And now I have understood something: I have also hurt his feelings with my behaviour, just as much as he has hurt me with his behaviour. It could be any moment that we might just call it quits for real. Do I really want this relationship to end? Honestly, despite all the sadness I feel, my answer is still a firm NO. I still love him, and my feelings for him has never changed since the day I found out that I am actually falling for him, even despite seeing a more negative side of him ever since I moved into his place. But then, will this be the first and last guy I will ever love and be with? I really hope he is the one for me eventually, because, if he is not, I will never want to fall in love again. One is enough for me to handle. I only want to give my heart and soul to just one person who deserves it. Just one to hold hands with, watch TV with, eat with, bicker with, do things with, spend time with and grow old with. If he is not the one, then what is the point of going through the same process again when it's gonna end anyway?

If life is short, we shall never hurt ourselves by any means, especially by falling in love, then fall out of it and getting heart-broken, leaving a scar that will cease to hurt with time, but will always be there to stay and remind you with. If relationships were meant to fail, why go on wasting your time when there are so many other things in life for you to do? It's like grazing your knee on the pavement when you know you'll get a scraped knee... If all you get will be hurt and tears, why invest your efforts in loving when nothing good will happen in the end? There is nothing wrong being single and loving and being loved by your family and friends. Love is so tough, it is a challenge that doesn't necessarily entail good results. It holds an unforeseeable future to the both of you, just as most futures are. However, this can entail a devastating consequence if the future became bleak, and then plunged into darkness. If you're lucky that fate is on your side, you will be happy. If you're not, you will just fall and get hurt over and over again.

Honestly, love is a crazy thing. It gets you all crazy and you can say and behave the most absurdly as any words could ever describe. Sometimes, I wonder if I should check myself in the asylum instead of roaming around Earth like a bomb ready to explode. I was normal before-- before I fell in love.

To me, I know somehow that I might be destined to live my life in solitude if my future becomes filled with darkness. I want to invest my time building a career and expanding my social circle. I know it's still too early to determine what my future should be like. But I really do hope that he will be the only ONE for me.