Self-inflicted pain
Look what I've done...
I've 'promised' myself that I should GIVE UP, and that I shouldn't spend too much time with him, and that my house will never be a holiday resort, nor should I go for coffees with him... (read my other post)... But what happened in the end? Not only I break all my 'promises' to myself, I went to the extent of doing 'more' too. I'm such a failure...... I can't even live up my own promises.... :(
Even though I had a cold war with him before and ignored him completely, it only lasted for 2 days, and on the 3rd day, I went back to normal, and he said he'll come over to stay with me that night. SO he came over to stay for one night, and I allowed him to.
What did I advocate myself? And what have I done?
I cooked supper for him too~ Just mee goreng from the instant mee pack, but I thought of the food I cooked the other day and decided to share with him. Helped him prepare (mixed the mee goreng and the cabbage and minced pork together) and he said it was very delicious.
I didn't even realise what I've done. Sharuen came downstairs to see what's cooking, and whilst his back was facing me, she turned and gave me a cold, HARD glare that shook me up and made me realise that, "i've gone too far".
She said that I should have just let him prepare his own supper.
She said that I shouldn't have shared my food with him.
But all I can think of is: to let him have a good, delicious supper.
I am THAT hopeless.
She helped me chuck his toothbrush and toothpaste into the back of the cupboard.
But I took them out and placed them back side by side with mine the next day.
I am THAT hopeless.
After supper and shower, I even made milo for both of us.
I was so tired after work and the hot milo made me sleepy. Fell asleep on the mattress just beside the sofa. He tucked me in (but I woke up the moment I feel the blanket on me) and he used his own jacket as his 'blanket'. Then it's my turn to tuck him in and went upstairs.
What have I done?? What did I do? Why did I do that? Why did I have to betray myself? When will I learn?
**************************************************************
Went to Kanata Japanese restaurant with him on Saturday (before work) and had late lunch together. I had a shellfish bento and he had a beef bento.
My bento
Shellfish and a tired-looking me (and hungry too)
His bento
He can't wait to pose for a photo lah... too hungry already.
**************************************************************
Then today (Sunday), I worked from 11am-4pm. Supposedly I should work til 3pm, but it was freaking busy and there're a few big group tables (e.g. 9-15 people a group) and there was just me, him, Lilian and Yong Shan, so Steven asked me to stay til 4pm. I had my fish fillet noodle soup after that, and spent another LOOOONNGGG time savouring my favorite noodle soup, but it doesn't matter how long I eat cuz I've already knocked off. Snapped a few photos here and there for fun.
Item #99 on our menu - fried fish fillet noodle soup - one of my favorite noodle soups (next is laksa). It tastes super SHIOK with lots of cut chilli in the soup, and lots of sambal for the fish. Heavenly........... But I can only have this after my work cuz I take a long time to eat soupy stuff!
Item #92 and #93 combined on our menu - steam/fried wanton noodle soup - Yew made a 'special' one for Yong Shan... it's not supposed to look like that lol...
A multi-purpose photo - the scene of Chom Chom from the counter, and also, our boss Steven was captured in the photo as well, sitting there looking 'concerned'.
Lilian and I - this 'shi jie' of mine is Andrew's gf, so that makes her Steven's 'daughter-in-law'.
He was preparing drinks (ice cheng teng) and I sneaked a shot, though it was kinda blurred....
I can literally feel my legs going to give way...... My soles doesn't belong to me... I've been working like hell - 6 days work week.
My easter holidays - gone with the wind. Work dominates the entire 2 weeks.
I've 'promised' myself that I should GIVE UP, and that I shouldn't spend too much time with him, and that my house will never be a holiday resort, nor should I go for coffees with him... (read my other post)... But what happened in the end? Not only I break all my 'promises' to myself, I went to the extent of doing 'more' too. I'm such a failure...... I can't even live up my own promises.... :(
Even though I had a cold war with him before and ignored him completely, it only lasted for 2 days, and on the 3rd day, I went back to normal, and he said he'll come over to stay with me that night. SO he came over to stay for one night, and I allowed him to.
What did I advocate myself? And what have I done?
I cooked supper for him too~ Just mee goreng from the instant mee pack, but I thought of the food I cooked the other day and decided to share with him. Helped him prepare (mixed the mee goreng and the cabbage and minced pork together) and he said it was very delicious.
I didn't even realise what I've done. Sharuen came downstairs to see what's cooking, and whilst his back was facing me, she turned and gave me a cold, HARD glare that shook me up and made me realise that, "i've gone too far".
She said that I should have just let him prepare his own supper.
She said that I shouldn't have shared my food with him.
But all I can think of is: to let him have a good, delicious supper.
I am THAT hopeless.
She helped me chuck his toothbrush and toothpaste into the back of the cupboard.
But I took them out and placed them back side by side with mine the next day.
I am THAT hopeless.
After supper and shower, I even made milo for both of us.
I was so tired after work and the hot milo made me sleepy. Fell asleep on the mattress just beside the sofa. He tucked me in (but I woke up the moment I feel the blanket on me) and he used his own jacket as his 'blanket'. Then it's my turn to tuck him in and went upstairs.
What have I done?? What did I do? Why did I do that? Why did I have to betray myself? When will I learn?
**************************************************************
Went to Kanata Japanese restaurant with him on Saturday (before work) and had late lunch together. I had a shellfish bento and he had a beef bento.
My bento
Shellfish and a tired-looking me (and hungry too)
His bento
He can't wait to pose for a photo lah... too hungry already.
**************************************************************
Then today (Sunday), I worked from 11am-4pm. Supposedly I should work til 3pm, but it was freaking busy and there're a few big group tables (e.g. 9-15 people a group) and there was just me, him, Lilian and Yong Shan, so Steven asked me to stay til 4pm. I had my fish fillet noodle soup after that, and spent another LOOOONNGGG time savouring my favorite noodle soup, but it doesn't matter how long I eat cuz I've already knocked off. Snapped a few photos here and there for fun.
Item #99 on our menu - fried fish fillet noodle soup - one of my favorite noodle soups (next is laksa). It tastes super SHIOK with lots of cut chilli in the soup, and lots of sambal for the fish. Heavenly........... But I can only have this after my work cuz I take a long time to eat soupy stuff!
Item #92 and #93 combined on our menu - steam/fried wanton noodle soup - Yew made a 'special' one for Yong Shan... it's not supposed to look like that lol...
A multi-purpose photo - the scene of Chom Chom from the counter, and also, our boss Steven was captured in the photo as well, sitting there looking 'concerned'.
Lilian and I - this 'shi jie' of mine is Andrew's gf, so that makes her Steven's 'daughter-in-law'.
He was preparing drinks (ice cheng teng) and I sneaked a shot, though it was kinda blurred....
I can literally feel my legs going to give way...... My soles doesn't belong to me... I've been working like hell - 6 days work week.
My easter holidays - gone with the wind. Work dominates the entire 2 weeks.
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